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Writer's pictureA New Life

Understanding French Etiquette: Do's and Don’ts for Newcomers

Moving to a new country is an exciting adventure, but it also comes with its fair share of challenges—especially when it comes to understanding and adapting to the local culture. If you’re planning to make France your new home, or even if you’re just visiting, getting a handle on French etiquette is key to blending in and feeling more at ease in your new surroundings.


The French are known for their rich cultural traditions and a strong sense of propriety, and while they are generally welcoming to newcomers, there are certain social norms and customs that you’ll want to keep in mind. To help you navigate this new terrain, we’ve put together a friendly guide on the do’s and don’ts of French etiquette.


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Do: Greet Everyone with a Bonjour

In France, greetings are a big deal. Whether you’re entering a shop, meeting someone for the first time, or just passing a neighbor in the street, it’s customary to say **“Bonjour”** (or **“Bonsoir”** in the evening) with a smile. Failing to do so can be seen as rude or dismissive.


If you’re meeting someone in a more formal setting, such as a business meeting, adding a “Monsieur” or “Madame” after your greeting is a nice touch that shows respect. And don’t forget the French tradition of “la bise”—the cheek kiss. While this is more common among friends and acquaintances, it’s good to be prepared. Typically, you’ll exchange two kisses, one on each cheek, but the number can vary by region!


Don’t: Rush Through Meals

In France, meals are meant to be savored, not rushed. Whether you’re dining at a friend’s home or at a restaurant, take your time to enjoy the food, conversation, and company. The French see meals as a time to connect, and eating too quickly or leaving the table before everyone is finished can come across as disrespectful.


If you’re invited to someone’s home for dinner, it’s polite to wait for the host to start eating before you begin. It’s also a nice gesture to bring a small gift, such as a bottle of wine, flowers, or a box of chocolates. Just be sure to avoid chrysanthemums—these are typically associated with funerals.


Do: Learn a Few Key French Phrases

While many people in France speak English, especially in larger cities, making an effort to speak French, even if it’s just a few basic phrases, will go a long way. The French appreciate when foreigners try to speak their language, and it shows that you’re making an effort to adapt to their culture.


Start with simple phrases like **“Merci”** (thank you), **“S’il vous plaît”** (please), and **“Excusez-moi”** (excuse me). Even if your French isn’t perfect, people will usually appreciate the effort and be more willing to help you out.


Don’t: Be Overly Familiar

The French tend to be more reserved in their interactions, especially with people they don’t know well. This means that being overly familiar or too casual, especially in a professional setting, can be seen as inappropriate.


When addressing someone you don’t know well, it’s best to use the formal **“vous”** rather than the informal **“tu”**. Over time, as you get to know someone better, they may invite you to switch to **“tu”**, but it’s always safer to start with the more formal option.


Do: Dress to Impress

The French are known for their sense of style, and appearance matters in France. Whether you’re going to the grocery store or attending a dinner party, it’s important to dress well and pay attention to your grooming. This doesn’t mean you need to wear designer clothes, but looking neat and put-together is key.


In general, the French favor a more classic and understated style. Avoid overly flashy or casual clothing, especially in formal settings. Remember, in France, how you present yourself is often seen as a reflection of who you are.


Don’t: Talk Too Loudly in Public

The French value discretion, and this extends to how they behave in public spaces. Loud conversations, whether on the phone or with others, can be seen as disruptive and impolite. In public places like cafes, restaurants, and public transport, keep your voice at a moderate level and be mindful of those around you.


This sense of discretion also applies to personal matters. The French are generally more private about their personal lives, so avoid asking overly personal questions, especially when you’re still getting to know someone.


Do: Embrace the Art of Conversation

One of the joys of living in France is engaging in thoughtful and stimulating conversations. The French love to discuss ideas, culture, politics, and philosophy, and they value articulate and well-reasoned arguments. Don’t be afraid to share your opinions, but be prepared to back them up with solid reasoning.


At the same time, it’s important to listen and show interest in what others have to say. Conversations in France are often a lively exchange of ideas, and being a good listener is just as important as being a good speaker.


So, as you embark on your French adventure, keep these do’s and don’ts in mind. With a little effort and a lot of curiosity, you’ll soon find yourself navigating French social life with ease. Bon courage!

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